Each of us has heard these phrases more than once in our lives and was seething with anger. At the same time, the opponent will still feel in an awkward situation, and if he wants to fend off with open aggression, then in the eyes of those around him, he will be the culprit of this conflict.
We present you the top 10 phrases indicating hidden aggression of the interlocutor.
10. “You just want everything to be perfect”
When the arguments ending explaining the constant postponement of the work, the person, not finding any excuse for himself, begins to blame the one who gave him this task. For example, a student did not do the homework because the professor asked too much. The subordinate did not invest in the budget of the project - it was the fault of the boss who poses impossible tasks.
According to this scheme, a person who is pointed out to his objective errors does not deny their absence, but proves that it was impossible to prevent them in this matter, and with a look of insulted innocence takes the position of victim of tyranny.
9. “Good”, “as you say”
Many believe that demonstrative resentment frees a person from the need to bear responsibility for his actions. The interlocutor can explain to him in detail what exactly does not suit him, trying to give reasonable arguments. And the hidden aggressor, in turn, instead of engaging in a constructive dialogue, agrees displeasedly, showing with all his appearance that they put pressure on him.
8. "Yes, I am coming!"
Remember, during your childhood, how many times did you need to repeat the request so that you began to fulfill it? Of course, maybe you were an obedient child who happily runs to clean up toys or do homework. However, most children resort to this phrase, with such intonation, as if they were making him load a coal car for the tenth time in a day.
Unfortunately, such behavior is characteristic not only of young children, but also of some adults, who are distinguished by a high degree of infantilism.
7. “You have done so well for a person with your level of education (qualification)”
Similar phrases can be classified as caustic compliments. This is the same as saying to an unmarried girl suffering from failures in her personal life: “Don’t worry, beauty is not the main thing in a woman”. Most often, replicas of this kind relate to age, level of education, social status or physical characteristics. They are used by those people who want to offend you for a living, and often this is done in public.
6. “I'm not angry”
No wonder some psychologists believe that in some situations a good war is better than a bad world. This is especially common in relations between spouses, for example, when a wife dissatisfied with something, instead of honestly confessing her feelings to her husband and openly discussing the painful, prefers to mask an insult with such phrases, although inside she may experience extremely negative emotions that are early or late, they still burst out.
5. “I thought you know”
With the help of such a phrase, a person simultaneously demonstrates hidden aggression and relieves himself of any responsibility. Such methods are usually resorted to by schemers, smiling at your face, and behind your back, adjusting various intrigues against you.
In time not to give an important letter or not to provide any information - these are the miserable methods that the aggressor is used to using.
4. “Of course I would be happy”
This replica is without fail included in the arsenal of service workers, telephone operators and government officials. They can smile at their interlocutor and during the conversation show genuine interest in someone else's problem, but there will be only one answer - a meaningless formal phrase.
The more you ask to speed up the resolution of your question, the more this process will be delayed.
3. "I did not know what you mean now"
In this case, the person is not satisfied with the essence of the request or order, but at the same time, he cannot say so directly. He finds a quite simple but primitive method - just delay the solution of the question as much as possible.
The main thing in this situation is not to lose your temper, because in this case the interlocutor will have a reason to be offended and make you guilty of everything. In a calm voice, repeat the request, indicating the exact time period in which it must meet.
2. “Why are you so upset?”
A person who is very fond of offensive rallies or loud public scandals suddenly says this in a sympathetic voice when tears appear in your eyes. With hyperbolic participation, he is interested in what exactly upset you. Thus, he enjoys the realization that the next time he can just as well establish himself at your expense. Therefore, do not give him such pleasure, loudly laugh at the offensive rally or, if you are not from a timid dozen, pour a glass of water or other liquid on his head. Thus, he will have the opportunity to appreciate your wit.
1. I was only joking
Sarcasm is a very formidable weapon, especially in skilled hands. Have you heard that a word can hit harder than a hammer? And when this “hammer” is properly flavored with humor, exposing everyone and everything, then it becomes in the hands of your opponent a formidable weapon, which can only be defeated by mirror measures. However, for this you also need to be sharp on the tongue, otherwise you will not be able to parry effectively. If you do not have such talent, then try not to at least show your resentment, because this is exactly what your opponent expects from you. Keep royal calm and ostentatious goodwill, so you will show to the interlocutor that all his efforts to get you crazy are futile.